Thursday, February 7, 2013

Pink Ribbons ~ Hair, Glorious Hair!

Pink Ribbons is a feature series I have started that is posted every Thursday.  I am a Pink Ribbon Warrior, having gone through the chemo, surgery, radiation, the year of waiting and recently stage 2 reconstruction...which I find is really the first of many little surgeries.  I am at a place in my life where I am willing to open my journal from that time and share with you my anger, fears, challenges and pain of finding out you have cancer.   This is me sharing with you from the other side of breast cancer.


These are not current events, events are from Sept. 2010


I cancelled my wig appointment yesterday. I had called and asked for a "ballpark" price range. I found out the ballpark STARTED at $300! Mr. R told me to disregard the price but I couldn't! I told him everyone I talk to hated wearing wigs. If I paid that much for one and hated it I'd feel pressure from within myself to wear it anyway. He told me to do what I felt so I cancelled it.

So I'm put-zing around the house today and the phone rings.  I answer and it's the American Cancer Society. 

They offered me a free wig and styling. (clapping) I had cancelled my appointment with the wig guy last night. I kept thinking...what if I hate wearing the wig? I have yet to meet someone who didn't and it didn't feel like a judicial use of funds to spend on something I might hate.  So I cancelled and told hubby maybe I will order one from my catalog. Or maybe I will just get more hats and a halo.  Halos are elastic bands with hair only attached.   They are made to wear with hats to give the illusion of having hair.



Yes, this is me wearing the above "halo" in blonde.

So the ACS explained my name had been submitted to them as a new breast cancer patient.  The asked questions about how my chemo went, and then told me about their free wig program.  They have a two time breast cancer survivor who used to instruct at a Beauty college locally. She donates her time to fit and style wigs for other breast cancer patients. Isn't that the coolest!

I have a 10 am appointment to get hair! I was horrified when I clipped my head. When you get down to my non dyed roots? I discovered I'm probably 75% glisteny silver haired. I hadn't bothered touching up...I mean why bother when your hair is bailing anyway.  Now it is sparse and with big blank spaces with a ratty bit gong here and there.  UGLY.

Maryland Crab
Hooray for the free wig!  Another great blessing, isn't it interesting you'd just cancelled the appointment.

I took a friend to help me choose my hair.  She's a close friend, and the first beside Mr. Rosey to see the mangy head.  I took a deep breath and just pulled off the hat.  It was rather like standing in the mall on a weight scale, yelling the results.  She didn't even react in horror as I expected.

I chose a Paula Young wig called Dance.  It nearly matched my own hair with just a tad more curl.  It's a little disconcerting.  I don't mind wearing it but it feels like it's moving around my head.  I feel like everyone can look at me and tell I'm wearing a wig.  I hope it will eventually feel more secure.

I showed her my favorite gift shop "Good and Perfect Gifts" Good and Perfect Gifts and then we had lunch.  I couldn't help but reach up and tug every so often to make sure the hair was sitting where it was supposed to be.  Which reminds me, when you see someone in a wig and it's alight askew, discretely whisper the fact to them.

It's more embarrassing to realize your wig has slid back AFTER you've spent the day in town.  It's rather like the time I had spent the day shopping and I stopped to visit my friend...the same one in fact.  She hugged me then as I turned to find a seat at her table when she burst out laughing and stopped me.  She reached out and pulled a clean *thank God!* pantyliner off the seat of my pants.  Yep, just like that...the horror of realizing you've been put-zing around down with your pantyliner exposed on the outside of your pants.  So help a sister with her hair.

Now I will model my new hair...it's a near match for my eyebrows which I still have....

While I do so, please sing the song from the musical Hair...|




 Gimme head with hair, Long beautiful hair, 
Shining, gleaming, Streaming, flaxen, waxen




Hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair
Flow it, show it!
 Long as God can grow it!
My hairrrrrrrrrrrr!



Paula Young hair catalog 


3 comments:

  1. I can sorta one up you on the pantiliner ... I went to change mine one day and realized it was no longer there. No idea when, or where, I lost it! Sigh ...

    Did you hair grow back after this? I don't think I could wear a wig. Never have liked anything on my head! I'd have to adopt a bald is beautiful mantra!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, the hair grew back. Within 2 months I was fuzzy again. It grew in stark white and silvery with curls. Another couple months, the darker blondes came in. I was alarmed as the tiny dark hairs looked like blackheads on my scalp. It was very noticeable through the white.

      As my hair lengthened, it also straightened. I'm back to stick straight. It does seem to HOLD a curl just a bit longer now.

      Some people can ROCK the bald. I could not. I even worse hats and scarves around the house. Both because I hated my scalp and because it's COLD to have no hair!

      Delete
  2. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete