Friday, October 26, 2012

**Estrogen Content** And Sarah Laughed

Our Bible study group has been looking at the lives of Abraham and Sarah.  They had quite some life didn't they?

Over the last few days I've been kicking around my head the concept of Sarah laughing when the Lord said, she would conceive in a year's time. 

 She laughed.

We talked about the fact that at her age, she was in menopause so the concept of conceiving...was inconceivable to her.  Among the people she knew, NO one her age had a baby.  So when the Lord will have a baby, well we would yuk it up as well.

This morning, I got out of the shower and went through the routine of greasing all of this glorious woman flesh.  I must do this because MENOPAUSE has dried me out.  All the flaking and shedding... I leave dna at the scene of every location.  As I go through this routine, I grumbled about the changes that menopause caused.

In case you don't know, I was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2000.  It was estrogen fed.  So after chemo, I was given injections to shut my ovaries down...because yes, Aunt Flo was tougher than chemo.  She hung in there for the whole ride.  After the mastectomies and the radiation, I was to have a complete hysterectomy.  I was allowed to wait until I had recovered physically and mentally from the treatment.  So I was given Lupron injections for 8 months before having the surgery.  I complained to the doctor about some very *ahem* intimate pain I was having.  She answered, 

"Oh, that's most likely caused by the vaginal walls thinning.  It happens after menopause."

After the pre-surgical exam, she informed me that my "walls" were extremely thin and fragile.  I had a very quick reduction in only 8 months.  I realize this is TMI, but I also know that a lot of us enter menopause not really understanding the process.  There just isn't a lot of conversation going on about what to expect in menopause.  Jokes yes, but not true conversation and information.  

Hot flashes get all the lime light, but there are other very inconvenient aspects to menopause that don't get a lot of press time.  Like sometimes you have to be careful how you sit down...because those thin vaginal walls will stretch and hurt.  The elasticity is gone.  The lubrication process is gone.  Your sexy hormones...gone.  

It's hard to want to have sex when you can't get hot and bothered anymore.  Really.  It's the saddest and most difficult part of menopause.  Seriously.  Give me back the power hot flashes if that means I get my sexual nature back. (Keep in mind that I'm also undergoing an oral chemo to further decrease estrogen production so it's a double whammy for me.)

I miss the ability to "get rowdy."

Okay now that you are all green and shuddering, lets go back to Sarah.  The Bible tells us this in Genesis 18:11 & 12

 Abraham and Sarah were old and getting on in years. Sarah had passed the age of childbearingSo she laughed to herself: “After I have become shriveled up and my lord is old, will I have delight?

Now, after my little intimate discussion with you, let's look at what Sarah said..."
I have become shriveled up".  Yes my sisters.  In all my previous readings of this passage, I just pictured Sarah as a heavily wrinkled, dry skinned old woman.  But this morning, it was a light bulb shining over my head.  Oh my.  Sarah had a dry hoo ha too!  She and Abraham may have 
well been past the ability to "get rowdy" themselves.  I mean it's not like she can run to Walmart for a bottle of Astroglide!  What's a woman to do in the centuries BC?  Maybe check out that scroll "101 Uses for Goat Fat"?  Sarah might have hooted because it had been some years since she and ole Abe had partaken of the horizontal fellowship.  I'm hoping the Lord gave her a little hormonal assistance in accomplishing this endeavor.

Can't you just imagine Abraham?  Poor Sarah.  Talk about a man's dream excuse for horizontal fellowship..."Honey, the LORD said it, so we must."

We know that the Lord said "this time next year, you will have a son".  To have a son, you must gestate for 40 weeks, give or take 2 weeks.  So Abraham was chasing her around the tents for quite a few months before she conceived.  Abraham was 100 years old when his son was born!  

Yes Sarah, I would have laughed as well.  I would have been rolling on the floor, holding my stomach and hooting over the idea of me and my 99 year old husband just TRYING to have a baby, much less actually succeeding.  I have to cut this woman some slack, Lord.  Knowing what I now know about menopause...I'd have laughed until tears streamed down my face.

**Recent news - 96 year old man becomes father for the 22 time with his 60 year old wife.  The article is rather snarky but here's a link...

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