Wednesday, March 28, 2012

I'm streaming!

Now THIS interesting. I am to write my stream of consciousness….which is apparently code word for “spaghetti brain.” That’s what I call it anyway. It refers to that book that Men are Like Waffles and Women are like Spaghetti.  See the book listing here  And it is true that women can seamlessly transition from one topic to the next without using turn signals, while we leave our men still sitting at the stop light waiting for the light to turn green.  

Regardless, I am to write my chain or strings of thought without too much processing and no editing.  The theory is that this is good for those critical times when you need to relay information but don't have time to real writing.  And it's also a good way to get something out of your head and onto paper.  But serious writer's do not consider this writing, no matter how fun it may be.  I am permitted to correct spelling and grievous errors in grammar.  But I am to leave the thoughts as they are.

Today I am up at the ungodly hour of 0500 or 5 am for those  who don’t read military. No particular reason other than I woke up and didn’t get back to sleep. If I lay away more than 30 minutes I get impatient. I commonly refer to these hours before 7 am as “before God gets up”. As a child, I thought the sun would not rise until God got up. Yes I know my theology was a little warped but I was 7. Cut me some slack. 

I started thinking of my list of chores to complete before my sister arrives tomorrow evening. So I got up, made my husband a breakfast burrito of egg and sausage for which he is quite grateful. Although I did notice him glancing at the clock when I awoke him to tell him I had made breakfast for him. I know well enough that he was weighing the choice of a hot breakfast or sleeping another 20 minutes. His love for eggs and sausage wrapped in a warm wheat tortilla won out.  Meanwhile, I’m inhaling a Diet Pepsi that happened to be sitting in my fridge, nice and cold. Don’t know how it got there, but it’s not there now.

I have three baskets of laundry to put away and 2 more downstairs in the machines. And I have to get those blasted invitations printed today. You know, how these print them yourself invitations seem like such a good deal? I’m just not quite certain of that anymore. By the time you buy the invitations – they aren’t too badly priced. But then ink…which is outrageously priced! It cannot cost this much to manufacture ink! They have been putting it in ball point pens for 50 or more years! Then there is the 200 hundred times you have to print and reprint because nothing in the box gives you orientation or margins so you have to start guessing and printing…which uses up another cartridge of ink. THEN you get to assemble the puppies…print, slip the sleeve over them, wrap the ribbon around them and attach the bow and the little pearl BEFORE you can even insert the invitation into the envelope. Which you still have to address and take to the post office. Now I’m questioning “is it ever appropriate to include that the bride and groom are registered at these stores?” So if you are single and hope to get married, put this in your little hope chest…BUY printed invitations. You can even do it online. Even if it looks like it will run a $100 or so, DO it. It will cost you less in time and frustration! By the time I felt it was all aligned and even, I was ready to CHEW those invitations!

I laugh at myself just a bit through all this, because I have been losing weight. If you don’t know me well then I will share that I can afford easily to lose about 40 more lbs. The thing is, I’m just not trying that hard. So then I started to worry when I realized I had dropped 10 lbs since Jan 5th when I last saw the doctor. Mr. Rosey tells me that I don’t realize how much food I am turning away. I turn down offers of ice cream or frozen yogurt because I simply just don’t want it.  Cakes and cookies – not so much.  I am actually leaving food on my plate which is BIG achievement regarding my food issues. But with all that, don’t think I’m this wonderful diet following nutrition fascist. Just ask the bag of Robin Egg candy I inhaled yesterday. Oh that’s right, you cannot because I ate most of them and hid the rest. Am I the only one who believes that if you hide the cookies or candies that you will somehow forget that it is there? Meanwhile, I have to repurchase more Robin Eggs for the kid’s Easter Basket. 

Which reminds me I need to be hunting for the best price on Ham as that has been the request for the dinner. I would prefer to have grilled pork steak, but tossing ham in the slow cooker works as well. Back to the losing weight, the reason I  was concerned about the weight was the fact that I had not been trying very hard and still lost the 10 lbs. Then when you put the ever hulking threat of more cancer, even losing weight becomes something to investigate rather than celebrate. But just in the last 48 hours I was taking my meds and stopped to look at them. One of my meds is commonly prescribed to assist people in weight loss as well as the prescribed use of the drug. Mr. Rosey says that is an “off label use” of the medication.  Like Benendryl is an anti-histamine, but many take it as a sleep aid.  And that explains my frequent bouts of nausea and lack of appetite.

I need to remember to make appointments for a check up this month and another eye exam. For the first time in my life, I find that I’m needing reading glasses to thread a stinkin’ needle. Sewing pearls on the veil is blinding my eyes. That’s me, the mother of the groom… and the bride…walking down the aisle blind as a bat.

Now Mr. Rosey needs a wash cloth and towel, which are still downstairs in the laundry room. Can you answer this? WHY do men routinely step into the shower without grabbing a towel or washcoth? I have tried to convince him to use my netted scrubby dohickies. But noooo....thats gross he claims. You reuse the same wad of netting on all your body parts over and over. I tried to convince him that its NETTING...there is nothing there for germs to attach to but won't hear of it. So he requires wash clothes to complete his business. Yet he continuously… *OK.  Maybe not continuously*… jumps in there without grabbing one and it’s not a problem today because I am already awake. But next time I am still sleeping and he yells from the bathroom....Rosey honey?! I forgot the washcloth and can you grab a towel too?  I may well strangle him with the towel! That's not the only thing....I can tell you how many times he climbs a ladder and then yells...Rosey hon?! Can you bring me a light bulb? Now tell me. Who climbs a ladder to change the light bulb but neglects to take a one up the ladder with him? Men. That's who. They seem to have some kind of blood flow issue between the thought and the doing. 

So I will cut short my spaghetti brain and retrieve his towel and his washcloth for him. Until something else impacts my brain that I must share with you, tootles and so long.

1 comment:

  1. I love you! LOL! Been there done that with the invitations. Second the motion to buy printed! And one of my Depression/Arthritis meds has off-label use of weight loss. Hasn't helped me in the least! But then stress has had me eating most anything that doesn't move out of my reach!